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Elfgirl Slaves
Sigh. The bank makes me yawn. Especially the stuffy, stark bank
of Ironforge.
"Nice helmet", I said, to a nearby gnome.
And the fun began.
"You think this is cool, you should see ...THIS!",
and he donned a cap that had a silly little spinning spiral.
"What is that suposed to do, hypnotize me?",
I giggled.
"Yesss, Massster...", said my friend (who
I like to call "Goggles") "We are your two elfgirl
slaaaves. Whaaat is your bidding?..."
"Er, if you could bring me some thorium, that
would be great!", declared our new master.
"I don't think we have any. Unless it's invisible."
"And very, very light", I added.
"Well, it is like that, but a bit greenish",
explained the gnome technomancer. "Sort of an invisible-green".
"Hmm..." Goggles and I took a look around.
"Tickle, give master thorium", she beseeched
of my croc. Tickle didn't budge. So she appealed to her pet bear,
and then to everyone in the bank.
"Azkeroth, give master thorium."
"Jeznerella, give master thorium."
"Zibbazabbazow, give master thorium."
And so on.
No one stepped up to the plate!
"Perhaps people would be more helpful if we
threatened to eat their brains. I mean, we ARE mindless, hypnotized
zombies..."
"Sure", said Goggles, "but how will
we GET to the brains?"
"I have this pickaxe!" I waved around
my pickaxe, making some nearby bank customers very nervous.
"Effective, but what if we just gnawed on their
heads?"
"Certainly! Head-gnawing can be an excellent
motivator."
"Tickle, give master thorium or we will gnaw
on your head!" He didn't do it. We beseeched the same of
the people around us, but only got the attention of people with
no thorium, and not enough brains worth gnawing.
Then, Goggles and I went outside with the Gadgeteer
and he challenged me to a duel.
"Ok!", I said, "I wonder who will
win!?!"
He blasted me with his hypno-ray and I was truly
his puppet to control! I wobbled this way and that, shrieking.
When it wore off I was ready for playtime!
"Hey! Stand still so I can hit you with my
pickaxe!" He ran in circles, while I knocked him in the head
over and over with my mining equipment. "Don't make me gnaw
your head!" After a while, my arms started getting tired.
"Well, is there a little white flag I can wave
around?" I was ready to surrender. He reeled back, and FLOOM!...
hit me with a fireball, scorching me within an inch of my little
elfy life.
"Ok, ok - you win. Right now we must be off
in search of brains, but if we find anything invisible-green-looking,
we'll lay it at your little gnomefeet."
